Three men decided to have a good, old-fashioned brawl at the Vagabond restaurant and lounge. Unknown to the three scrappers, however, the annual police-appreciation dinner was taking place at the nearby Elks lodge. To make matters worse, the police affair was breaking up just as the fight at the Vagabond was breaking out. Ten officers quickly quelled the disturbance.

“You know, these guys picked a really wrong day to have this,'’ Forks police Chief Bruce Hall said Monday.

Three Shelton men were taken into custody on various charges related to the brawl.

A 29-year-old man was booked into Clallam County Jail on suspicion of second-degree assault, while a 32-year-old will face possible charges of fourth-degree assault, Hall said. The third suspect is accused of obstructing police because he led Forks Officer Jim Dixon and Hall on a block-long foot chase.

Hall said the three men had been thrown out of the Vagabond a couple of hours earlier for causing a disturbance. They returned about 9 p.m., resisting owner Claude Clark’s attempt to force them out.

Patron William Backman of Forks intervened, but was kicked and punched by at least two of the suspects, Hall said. He was treated at Forks Community Hospital for three cracked vertebrae.

Hall said he had no idea why the brawl erupted. The men arrested were apparently in town on a fishing excursion.

“They weren’t really happy about missing their fishing trip,'’ he said.

Hall said there would normally be one officer, one supervisor and a dispatcher on duty on a Saturday night.

“It was nice to have the extra help,'’ he said.

Morgan Ottridge is a happy guy after he used the redial feature on his phone to track the man who stole his leather jacket and big-screen television from his home while he was sleeping. Using only a cordless phone and a detective’s instincts, Morgan Ottridge gave police a set of clues that helped them reach out and nab a burglary suspect.

The east Vancouver man was awakened about 6:30 a.m. Tuesday by his roommate who had noticed that several items were missing from their house, including their big-screen TV, Sony PlayStation and Ottridge’s prized leather jacket. And the cordless phone.

Ottridge pressed the phone’s “page” button, which causes a beep that can be used to locate the handset when it is misplaced. Leaving a candle on top of the button so it would ring continuously, Ottridge followed the faint sound of the beeper outside.

“When I got outside it was a bit louder — towards my neighbour’s house,” he said Thursday. “I just followed it, louder and louder.”

He found the phone in the hedge of his neighbour’s yard. Then things got interesting. Ottridge picked up the phone and pressed the redial button — which rang the last number that had been called on the phone: Yellow Cab dispatch.

The cab company confirmed one of its drivers had indeed picked up a fare on Ottridge’s street, a few doors from his house, at about 2:20 a.m. And the cabbie had told the dispatcher there were lots of items that had to be loaded into the trunk. One of them was a big-screen TV.

Ottridge’s next stop: the police station. They found out from the cab company where the fare had been dropped off. A more cunning thief might have asked to be let off a block or two away from his residence, but the suspect had been dropped off right in front of his house.

When police went to the suspect’s home, they found a woman who told them her boyfriend was in court that morning on a breaking-and-entering charge. She allowed the officers into the house to look around, police spokeswoman Constable Anne Drennan said.

The officers found property that appeared to be from the victim’s home, including the TV. They then went to the courtroom where the suspect was supposed to appear and found him waiting outside — wearing Ottridge’s leather jacket.

Ottridge said police returned the TV and jacket to him. But some CDs and his video game machine are still missing. Drennan said charges are expected against the suspect for possession of stolen property and possibly breaking-and-entering.

Story courtesy of Nick Didlick and the Vancouver Sun.

By JESSICA HANSEN
Milwaukee Journal Sentinel

After gambling - and losing - at a Turtle Lake, Wis., casino, a Minnesota man roughed himself up in the parking lot and called police to report that he was robbed, a complaint says.

A good story, considering John Robert Broos Jr. had the bumps and bruises to prove the alleged attack.

Good, but not quite good enough. Broos apparently didn’t know that someone was watching.

According to a criminal complaint filed Nov. 21, surveillance cameras recorded Broos beating himself against a light pole, smudging dirt on his cheeks, and - after checking the damage in his car mirror - repeating the process until he achieved just the right “I got robbed” look.

Broos, 57, of Lino Lakes, Minn., now faces charges for the tall tale - one of the stranger obstruction cases to be prosecuted in Barron County, an official said this week.

“In this profession, it’s hard to be surprised anymore, especially after 22 years, but it is unusual,” said Ruth Bachman, the Barron County assistant district attorney prosecuting the case.

“I’ve certainly had cases where people lied to the police to help themselves out,” she added, “but I don’t know that I can say that I’ve ever had someone go to the extreme of injuring themselves to do that.”

Broos, who couldn’t be reached for comment, faces a misdemeanor obstruction charge, which, if he is convicted, carries a maximum penalty of a $10,000 fine and nine months in jail. He was ordered to appear in Barron County Circuit Court December 13.

Here is a real classic, courtesy of the Jefferson County Sheriff’s Department in Louisville, Kentucky. A man makes a botched attempt at robbing a movie theater. Does he give up and go home? No! He walks across the street and tries to rob the Taco Bell - while two uniformed sheriff’s deputies are inside having lunch!

Here’s the story as told by one of the arresting officers:

On Wed the 29th of Nov, 2000 at approx. 1600hrs I was sitting at a Taco Bell in a very busy part of town waiting for my partner to show up. While I was sitting there A BOLO report came out from the County Police that an attempted robbery had taken place accross the street at the cinemas. I didnt see anything as I was sitting there, so I figured it must have been earlier in the day.

My partner shows up and we go into the Taco Bell and order our food. We sit down and start to eat. My partner Bill had ordered his Chalupa without sour cream and he didn’t get it his way. So he goes back up to the counter to get his order fixed and a few of the employees are shuffeling toward the back of the store where the cooler is. There was a man standingf at the register so Bill thought that it was strange. About this time the rest of the employees start making their way to the back pointing at the man from the counter. Needless to say, Bill thought this was kind of strange.

Bill looks back to the guy as the employees are ponting toward the man and he is attempting to leave the restaruant. He runs up and catches the man outside of the store. I hear all the comotion in the kitcjen as our table was next to the kitchen door. i look up as Bill is trying to cuff some man. I think to myself, “why does this stuff always happen when you are trying to eat.”

I get up and assist Bill, still not sure why we are detaining him but trusting my partner. We pat him down and find nothing on him and hwe states this is all a mix up. At this time a worker comes out and informes us that the man had just attempted to rob them.

Now I was a little suprised because I still wasn’t sure why we were doing this and I thought this might be a joke at my expense but to my suprise beat cars start showing up as we are placing the suspect in the back of Bill’s cruiser. Both Bill and I had our marked units out front of the store and are both in uniform. They ask if we were answering the hold up alarm and we told them no. We were just trying to have dinner when this person tried to rob them.

Much to everyones suprise (if you think that could be possible after everything else that happened) this was the person who tried to rob the Cinemas. So not only did we save our selves from down right embaressment (if not for sour cream he might have succeded without us knowing) We also caught the person who tried to do the earlier hold up.

This kind of puts a whole new meaning to the commercial of “Drop the Chalupa”. I just thank god that we hadnt stopped into a donut shop.