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Archive for January, 2001

Man checks into hospital, but not as a patient

While working the afternoon shift as a shift supervisor, I had officers sweep our hospital to check for squatters. It was a clear and somewhat cold night in downtown Detroit, and the homeless popoulation are known to enter our hospital and hide for the night.

While checking one of the closed clinics officers came upon 5 people that had not belonged there. After a quick field investigation, the officers let 3 of the suspects go, and returned the other 2 to our station for further investigation.

Upon arrival to the station, identification was received from both parties and a subsequent search of the patient database was completed. One of the suspects handed an officer an identification that came back as being an unregistered person within our patient database. When asked further, it was determined to run the suspect through the LEIN system for a warrant check.

The suspect had an outstanding warrant. Upon hearing the officers discuss these findings, the suspect then shouted out, “Wait a minute that wasn’t me, this is my ID!” as he handed the officer another identication card. Again the suspect was entered into the patient database,

The officers again entered the new information into the LEIN system. Wouldn’t you know it, this time the suspects information came back with several outstanding warrants. With no other ID’s in his pocket, this time the suspect could do nothing but wait with his newly issued trespassing violations until he was transported by the issuing agency to jail.

Man pretends to be high school student

Hooker solicits police officer

Burglar imitates Santa Claus

Dumb crook departs Earth the hard way

Meanwhile, in The United Kingdom . . .

Bad luck, police catch up with suspect

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